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pretty is…..

January 27, 2014

SO, a tiny little lightweight non – earthshattering superficial dagney thought process:

what is with all the hub bub about convincing women they are beautiful no matter what they look like physically?  how about telling/convincing/suggesting to people in general that they are worthy, no matter what.  and women, young girls, daughters???  please make sure they feel fabulous about themselves no matter their age, their weight, their color…i mean, i get it….it IS lovely to feel beautiful.  but there is SO much more….

i, myself, would rather be convinced i am passionate, or witty, or intelligent, or kind, or loyal….  and, sure, if you’ve been treated like you are “ugly”, i do hope someone does make you feel beautiful.  but, not just because you are on the outside.

i am dating, and some of it is online…and in this online dating world the first “weed out” factor is looks.  i get it, but it irks me.  i can honestly say that i don’t really see the way people look on the outside…sure, i can tell you the color of their hair or maybe if they are tall or short.  but, i immediately want to meet them, so i can get a feel for them.  this is still “judgemental”, but seems to me a better judge of character….of both the judger & the judgee…..(those are made up words, bytheway, don’t judge:))

i had a date with a lovely woman last evening and she asked me what my type is…..she described her type to me without mentioning physical traits.  i like that.  i would describe mine the same…IF i had a type.  i do not seem to.

who cares how physically beautiful you are if you are not loyal, if you are not kind, if you are not a generous spirit…….IN FACT, if you are not any of those things, how pretty can you possibly be?

i joke with a friend that i spend a lot of time looking in the mirror.  i complain about my “old” “saggy” face….so, clearly i am superficial.  i like my body better when i am smaller.  i like my hair when it is longer.  i wear make up….well, some.  so, yes, superficial i can be!

and, i know some of this is about health.  it is not healthy to be too little and not healthy to be too big…etc etc etc….i get that advertising in the past had depicted “beautiful” women as unhealthily skinny.  BLECH!  and, while i think this recent onslaught of ad campaigns to make women feel beautiful no matter how they look is positive and definitely an improvement from advertising campaigns of the past….if you truly judge someone based on how they look on the outside, then I don’t think YOU are very ”pretty”….. (which, yes, is also judgement….i know!) so, there!

tell a woman they are smart, tell them they have a big heart….whatever beautiful qualities they have, remind them.  then they will feel beautiful!  in that case…tell anyone.  you know that quote???…. something like “people won’t remember what you said, they will remember how you made them feel!”…guess i just made that NOT a quote, but, oh well!…..make people feel GOOOOOOOOD!

here’s the flip of that particular coin:  if you want to feel beautiful then take the time to make someone else feel good….just anyone, any time, any how…with a smile, a rant on their fabulous qualities, a pat on the back, or HOWever……THEN they will feel that you are beautiful and you will feel beautiful.  and, it will really have nothing to do with aesthetics.

pretty is as pretty does……seriously.

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