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March 20, 2015

surprised by my heart

surprised that i love you like this

surprised by my favortism

surprised at my desire to please

surprised at my need and intent to do well

surprised at the intimacy

surprised by the fear that rocks me to my core

surprised by how desperate i am to carry your pain

surprised at the swelling of joy, breathtaking, whenever i lay eyes on you

surprised at the unbearable pain when you experience pain

surprised at the volatility and anger when i  disappoint you

surprised at my gut instinct that’s instincted by you

surprised at the power i wield

surprised at the influence i carry and shed

surprised by the emotion i receive from you

surprised at the pain i can inflict

surprised by how overcome with even more love i am today after just yesterday thinking holy fucking shit how MUCH i love you

surprised how shocked i am when you are different from me, still

even more surprised when i see myself in you

surprised by how engulfed and without perspective i can be day to day regarding you

surprised at the overwhelming exhaustion at the thought of responsibility for you

surprised surprised surprised

after all these years, how soul shaking

unbelievably……three times over

how achingly astoundingly beautiful

how tear jerking

just completely and utterly surprised at my capacity to love you like this……

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